Scammer getting trolled

I usually try to keep things on my business page and blog very...business-like...but this is not one of those times.  
See, when you're a photographer (or basically anyone selling a service or product online), your contact information is readily available.  And that means you will get scammers contacting you.  This was the second one of the day.  They appear to be interested in what you are selling, want to hire you, and are ready to give you their credit card ASAP!  Sweet deal, right?  No.
I'm sure there are several ways scammers do it, but the most common one I've seen is, someone contacts me looking for a photographer for an event like a family reunion or wedding.  They want to pay me with their credit card right away.  The catch is, they will pay me more than the amount quoted and I just need to send that excess amount back to them or their event planner or something similar.   Then the card gets charged back (because it's probably been stolen) and that money I sent to their "planner" is pocketed.  Boom.  Scammed.
Fortunately for me I'm not silly enough to fall for it, and fortunately for you, I've documented one of these text exchanges, and even our live phone call.
 
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He "will like to know" if I offer photographer service.

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I opened it up with "hot nuggets!" and talk of bowel movements.  He persisted, and was even going to let me know the location once it's booked "here in the city" (um which city?)

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Talia loves weddings.  And jamming fees in your face.

photography scam

I'm really pretty, but also broke. And on meth.  Bring me the coffeeeee!!

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rotflmao

At this point, the guy called me.  I was NOT expecting that and was actually sitting at an appointment with my 2 year old.  I ignored the call and told him to call me back.  Several hours later, he texted me and said he was going to call.  I live streamed it in my photography group.  Unfortunately it was extremely difficult to hear him, but we still had fun screwing with him. 

*If this post made you laugh, comment below.  Tell me what you would have said to the scammer